Contemplating how to prepare for your first psychotherapy session? It is not as daunting as it might at first seem. In fact, you should pat yourself on the back for investing in self-care.
No matter what challenges you may be facing or symptoms you may be feeling, psychotherapy can help you feel better. You still may feel nervous about getting started with therapy and want to know how to make the most of your and your therapist’s time together. Here’s a roundup of what to know to make your first psychotherapy appointment easier.
Scheduling Your First Psychotherapy Appointment
When you’re talking with a psychologist to schedule an appointment, one of the first things they will want to know about is what difficulty or challenge you may be facing and what you need help with. The psychologist you choose to work with should make you feel accepted and welcome no matter what is going on in your life.
Take advantage of setting up an introductory call to get to know your therapist and get your initial questions answered. This can help you get to know them a little bit more.
Scheduling
Your therapist may recommend meeting weekly. If somebody is having a lot of difficulty, then a psychologist may suggest meeting more often. The frequency of meetings largely depends on what circumstances or symptoms you’re facing. If something traumatic comes up, you can always change the frequency of meetings when you’re in need.
Insurance and Benefits
One of the first questions you may be asked before setting up an appointment is to learn more about your health insurance. This way, your psychotherapist can contact the insurance company to learn what mental health benefits you have and find out if any pre-authorization is required. They will then be able to let you know ahead of time what your insurance benefits are so you can make decisions and determine payment arrangements that work for you both.
Payment Arrangements
Many people like to pay after each session, but some prefer to pay monthly. With so many options these days, payments can be made by check or keeping a credit card on file if you wish. Ask what options and payment plans may be available.
Feelings You May Have Before Starting Psychotherapy
Anxiety or uncertainty is very understandable and completely normal. I hear that all the time that people are a little nervous to start working with a psychologist.
It might be surprising but I have experienced that, too. When I was doing my own psychotherapy. I was nervous. I was thinking to myself: What’s what’s going to happen? Are they gonna think I’m crazy? Will they think, “Oh, this is so silly that I’m worried about this”?
You may even wonder if your thoughts might mean you need to be hospitalized. However, that is very rare for most people, so it’s probably not something you need to worry about.
Psychologists understand why you’re seeking mental health treatment. What you don’t have to worry about is feeling judged. There’s usually a very good reason you feel the way you do. You are most likely NOT “crazy” at all. Usually, the patients I see are feeling stuck, are in pain or are upset, sad or angry and are not sure what to do next. The good news is that psychotherapy can help.
What Happens at the First Psychotherapy Appointment?
Learning what to expect at the first appointment can set your mind at ease before it even happens. You can, of course, ask any questions that have come up for you about the therapeutic process or anything else related to that. There will be some logistical things to go over such as HIPAA privacy notices to protect your confidentiality, any intake paperwork you’ve completed, and late cancellation policies.
Then your session will begin. Your psychotherapist will want to know more about what’s bringing you in, and they will ask for more details, including when the difficulty started and any history you can share. Your therapist will be curious to learn what you’ve tried to help yourself, including self-help books you’ve read, things you’ve tried, or even past therapy experiences, if you have tried those.
Then, your psychologist will want to learn more about your general history — about you, your family, relationships with your parents, siblings, or partner. They will also go over medical history, education, work experiences, hobbies and interests.
Sometimes it can take a couple of sessions to get all the history because the first meeting is often dedicated to talking in great details about what is going on and what challenges you need help with now.
Partnering to Find Your “Why” for Coming to Therapy
During your session, a good therapist will want to talk about whatever you want to talk about. You can talk about a relationship that is causing distress. Maybe you are depressed about some changes in your life, and want some ideas for how to cope. Maybe you just need to vent and be heard to process what’s been happening. Psychotherapy is a safe place for these conversations to happen.
Psychotherapists let clients direct how they would like to start, and then proceed from there. They can help them think about and explore their feelings, situations and relationships. They can offer ideas for coping. As they get to know you better, they might suggest patterns they have been observing or challenge some of your assumptions. It can give them a different perspective and a different way of approaching things.
Whether we call it goal-setting or not, psychotherapists help each client find their “why” for coming to therapy if they aren’t able to put it into words. Sometimes it may take some time to get there, but it gives a direction to head toward. Maybe you want better relationships with co-workers so you don’t blow up when things get off track. Learning more about why that happens for people and what the root cause may be can give people more understanding and the ability to make changes in their lives that help them feel empowered.
The Therapeutic Relationship in Action
No matter what psychotherapy approach is used, the healing and change is an outcome of the relationship between therapist and client. That’s the “secret sauce.”
No matter how you are feeling, a psychologist knows it’s often for a very good reason. It’s probably a very understandable reaction to some difficulty or challenge in their life. Let’s say somebody is worried about how they are performing at their job. We can explore “the evidence” to figure out a way forward.
Their boss may be very happy with the work that they’re doing, but that’s not how they are feeling inside. They may be an anxious person because someone earlier in their life was harshly critical of them. And they’ve reacted by becoming overly critical of themselves, taking perfectionism to new heights. We can look at that situation and try to understand it.
Being aware of that history and having more understanding about where it came from can make it easier to flip the internal script. This can help people understand what is going on when they start to feel that anxiety coming on. They can catch themselves doing that and choose a different reaction.
Maybe the internal dialogue looks like this: “Hey, wait, I’m just being overly harsh on myself, and I’m being perfectionistic.” More of this self-knowledge can help tamp down their anxiety. It may take some time and practice to develop this habit, and that’s also normal.
This is just one example of how a therapeutic relationship with a skilled psychotherapist can help a client feel better and find permanent solutions.
Schedule Yourself a Bubble
If it makes sense, you can take care of yourself by scheduling some time before or after your session. Think about not scheduling yourself so tightly if you can. Factor in drive time and your next obligation such as a meeting or other place you have to go.
After therapy appointments for myself, I’d sometimes use the drive time before and after to think about things a bit. It helped me get into the right frame of mind for the rest of my day.
I also recommend keeping contact information handy in case an emergency comes and you need to reschedule.
What You Say Is Kept Confidential
A psychologist can’t share anything about you or even that they are seeing you in psychotherapy without your permission. The only exceptions to that confidentiality rule are if someone is in imminent danger of hurting themselves or someone else. They are also legally required to report any child or elderly abuse they learn about.
If you have insurance, your psychologist may be required to share a diagnosis with them and sometimes treatment progress in general terms.
Your psychotherapist can be subpoenaed by a judge to reveal certain things, but that is very rare. In 18 years of practice it has never happened to me. If you have questions or are worried about privacy, your psychologist should welcome any questions that you have.
Unlock the Benefits of Psychotherapy
It takes a great deal of courage to start psychotherapy, and the rewards can be long-lasting. I can speak to this as a psychotherapist myself and as a patient.
If you’re ready for compassionate support from a skilled psychologist, I would be very happy to work with you. Contact me to set up an introductory call or schedule your first psychotherapy appointment today.
